Parenting styles matter – they affect how children learn, behave, and feel
Raising children can be challenging, and not always the happy-go-lucky imagery we see in movies. Parenting is a constant balancing act. What works for one family may not be the best option for yours, so it’s all about finding your perfect fit…
Understanding parenting styles
Parenting style refers to the consistent strategies and attitudes you use when raising your children. How you parent helps to shape a child’s behaviour, confidence, and emotional health.
Every parent has their ideal way of raising children, their specific values, and what they’d like to pass on to their children.
All parents also usually have one common goal: to raise happy, healthy children.
Are you aware of your parenting style? How do you respond to your child? There are four main types of parenting styles. Research suggests that each has a different effect on children’s behaviour and can be identified by certain characteristics.
Let’s look at the core parenting styles and see which one you identify with.
The Permissive Parent
- Highly responsive and rarely makes demands.
- Communicates openly and usually allows children to make decisions, rather than giving strict direction.
- Rules and expectations are flexible and not strictly enforced.
This type of parent typically goes to great lengths to keep their children happy, sometimes at their own expense. Permissive parents enjoy being friends with their child, and generally shy away from setting rules and boundaries.
The Authoritative Parent
- Highly responsive and has strong expectations.
- Sets clear rules, while also being flexible and understanding.
- Communicates frequently; they listen to and consider their child’s thoughts, feelings, and opinions.
- Allows natural consequences to happen and uses these as learning and reflection opportunities.
Authoritative parents are nurturing, supportive and often in tune with their children’s needs. They guide their children and value open and candid discussions to teach morals and values.
The Authoritarian Parent
- Highly demanding.
- Implements strict rules without always considering the child’s feelings and needs.
- Not open to negotiations or follow-up discussions.
- Communication is mostly one-way from parent to child.
This parenting style is mostly about “tough love”. This parent likes to be in full control, is stern and has strict and rigid ways of disciplining children. Children who are typically raised this way may be obedient at first, but can also be anxious, less socially adept, or rebel as they grow older.
A child who is loved has many names. – Hausa Proverb
The Neglectful Parent
- Doesn’t really respond to urgent or worrying situations.
- Allows children to mostly fend for themselves and can seem indifferent or uninvolved in the child’s life.
- Offers little nurturing, guidance, and attention.
- Often struggles with their own self-esteem issues and has difficulty forming close relationships.
A neglectful parent is often referred to as an uninvolved parent as they are detached from their children. This means they don’t really implement rules and have an overall sense of indifference.
Remember
As a parent you may not fit into just one category. Focus on doing what’s best for you and your family and find healthy and sustainable ways of raising your children so they become well-adjusted adults.
Images: Pexels/Freepik
