Yes, Children Have Stress Too – And How To Help Them

More than ever, children are experiencing stress and other mental health conditions

Children are like little sponges, observing the world around them even when it may not seem obvious. Which means that they are just as vulnerable as adults to internal and external stressors.

The statistics are concerning. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), approximately one in seven adolescents aged 10–19 lives with a mental disorder globally, contributing to around 15% of the disease burden in this age group. Depression, anxiety, and behavioural disorders are among the most common causes of illness and disability in adolescents worldwide.

Quick Read:

Whether it’s school pressures, conflicts with friends or family, or the general busyness of life, children also go through stressful experiences.
In today’s fast-paced, technology-driven world, this stress sometimes passes unnoticed until it manifests in physical or emotional symptoms.
Many children respond well to therapies that focus on understanding their emotions, and equipping them with practical tools to manage their feelings.

Why do children experience stress?

Children get stressed for many of the same reasons adults do, but their stressors can be heightened by factors specific to their age and development.

For example, as a parent, you may not realise that your child hears or see conflicts with your partner. Which means that you must be mindful of how you behave and speak around them. Arguing with your partner in front of your kids or openly discussing financial difficulties can create anxiety for them. Children may not fully understand the situation, but they often internalise it, sometimes blaming themselves for problems at home.

External pressures that contribute to children’s stress:

School pressures: Homework, tests, and the social dynamics of school can all be overwhelming for children. With increased academic expectations and, in some cases, intense extracurricular schedules, children may feel like they are constantly under pressure.
Family changes: Divorce, a new sibling, or a move to a new home can create instability. Children thrive on routine, and when that’s disrupted, it can cause stress.
Social interactions: Friendship issues, bullying, or feeling left out at school can weigh heavily on a child’s mind, particularly in the digital age where social media amplifies these interactions.
External events: Global issues such as pandemics, climate change, and even news of violence or disasters can affect children. We need to remember that children don’t have the mature emotional tools to process these things, which can lead to anxiety and fear.

How do I know if my child is stressed?

Recognising stress in children can be challenging because they may not always have the emotional awareness or vocabulary to explain what they’re feeling. Watch for these signs:

Frequent headaches: Stress can appear as physical symptoms, with headaches being a common complaint. These may be linked to emotional pressure, poor sleep, too much screen time, or not enough physical activity.
Constant illness: Frequent colds, coughs, or feeling unwell may sometimes be linked to ongoing stress, which can affect how the body responds to everyday challenges.
Stomach issues: Stress can affect the digestive system, leading to symptoms such as nausea, stomach aches, vomiting, diarrhoea, or changes in appetite. Some children may eat less, while others may eat more when they feel overwhelmed.
Changes in behaviour or emotions: A stressed child may become more irritable, withdrawn, tearful, clingy, or have sudden changes in their usual personality. They may also struggle with concentration, sleep, or managing everyday frustrations.

Sleep changes

Changes in sleep patterns, including difficulty falling asleep, restless nights, or frequent bad dreams, can also indicate that your child is feeling overwhelmed. Including naps, recommended sleep amounts are: newborns (0–3 months) 14–17 hours, infants (4–12 months) 12–16 hours, toddlers (1–2 years) 11–14 hours, preschoolers (3–5 years) 10–13 hours, school-age children (6–12 years) 9–12 hours, and teenagers (13–18 years) 8–10 hours.

What the family talks about in the evening, the child says in the morning.
– Ethiopian Proverb

Help at hand

As a parent, it’s important that you watch for these signs and symptoms. If you notice these problems, speak to your child and communicate often to soothe their worries and stress as soon as possible.
Ask them what worries them and be gentle with finding ways to alleviate their stress. If it’s related to school pressures, you may want to get your child’s teacher involved so you get a clearer idea of the bigger picture when you’re not with them.
It’s worth looking at your child’s extracurricular activities – is he overscheduled? Are there too many activities? Speak with him about how he feels about his activities and if he really enjoys them all. Maybe you can consider dropping a few if he’s feeling overwhelmed. Your child, just like you, needs rest and rejuvenation.
Schedule relaxation time for the family. Make this a time for talking and sharing feelings, worries, and fears. By communicating often with your child, you can recognise the symptoms of stress early on, and take proactive steps to help them.
Manage your own stress and be considerate to not vent in front of your child. You don’t want your child to feel as if he’s to blame for your issues.

It’s time to consider professional help when emotional or behavioural changes in your child persist over time, worsen in intensity, or begin to interfere with daily functioning such as school performance, sleep, friendships, or family relationships.